Top Ten Reasons Sarah Palin Will Not Appear on Saturday Night Live

  1. It’s filmed at night and that’s when witchcraft is most powerful.
  2. It’s on a Saturday and she will be sharing Shabbot  with Jews for Jesus leader David Brinker.
  3. It’s a live show. Remember when Sinead O’Connor appeared on SNL?
  4. It’s in New York City and the state of Alaska has already told her that she cannot bill them for a per diem if she goes there.
  5. Er … she doesn’t have a sense of humor about herself and they think she’ll be a flop?
  6. Her flute is in the shop getting repaired.
  7. Madonna will be the surprise musical guest.
  8. John McCain’s been making goo-goo eyes at Tina Fey so Sarah’s afraid to leave his side.
  9. Todd is worried that she’ll develop an affair of the heart with Lorne Michaels.
  10. She’ll be down the street getting ready for her interview with David Letterman.

Update October 11th: Let’s add number 11 for luck. Do you think her reception will be any better than the one she received when she dropped the puck at the Philadelphia Flyers game? The SNL studio band will not be able to drown out the boos.

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